Cheryl Sopkin

July 10, 2009

From Pampa to Pinchas

Good evening!

Section 32, B-A6, off of Rural Route 30 in Pampa , Texas is one of the pieces of land claimed by my great-grandfather, Karl Henry Sohns in 1898 as part of the Homestead Act.  It’s up in the northern Panhandle of Texas, 50 miles east of Amarillo , and was the site of the family home that stood through the Dust Bowl and too many tornados and wildfires.

Today, the house is gone, but the land (640 acres), mostly scrub brush, is good grazing land for 29 head of cattle and it boasts the last two windmills that pump water in the county.

The parcel was to be handed down to me at my Great Aunt Evelyn’s passing, but she legally disowned me many years ago after learning that I was dating someone Jewish.

So, I am especially drawn to the part of this week’s parasha:  Pinchas from Numbers 27 that tells the story of the five daughters of Tzelophehad.

In the story the Israelites are making preparations to move on to the Promised Land. A census is taken so the land can be divided among those that are preparing to go on.

In years past the census was taken counting the households by the number of men. But this time, five women – all sisters: Machlah, Noah, Hoglah,  Milcah and Tirzah - come together to Moses, asking that they be given their deceased father’s land. They wish to keep their father’s name alive and to be an integral part of the community as landowners. In those days women did not own land; fathers left the land to their male heirs.

Moses took their request to God who agreed with the sisters. God told Moses that the father’s share of the land should be transferred to them and also from then on if a man dies without leaving a son, his property shall be transferred to his daughter.

God also added that the land be given to the sisters as “hereditary” – not only do they receive the land, but they also are able to pass the land on as an inheritance to other family members.

In The Women's Torah Commentary edited by Rabbi Elyse Goldsteins,  Rabbi Pamela Wax writes: “Today we recognize the emotional ramifications of inheritance and the division of estates. Inheritance is not a legal matter but also a deeply emotional matter; having deep spiritual and psychological meaning. ..Being part of the loop of succession paves the way…It helps a person feel properly loved and provided for by his or her parents.”

To me being “part of the loop” also means being a full member of a family and even a larger community.

A congregation is like a family in many ways.

Those brave sisters wanted their father’s land in order to be able to stay connected to their family heritage. They wanted to be independent, contributing members of the community and not to be economically dependent on others. They helped create a new world order; God agreed and extended the law for future generations.

Creating a new world order remains relevant today as our congregation approaches new ways to be more inclusive and accepting of non-Jews in the Beth Am community. Rabbi Marder’s decision to officiate at weddings where one partner is not Jewish but the couple agrees to create a Jewish home together, led to the creation of an Interfaith Outreach Committee. For a year, we met to explore the landscape of Beth Am’s practices to find out how welcoming the community is to members as well as to outsiders.

Like Moses the committee took a census of sorts, asking congregants to share their views and interests on various topics in order to gauge the effectiveness of our synagogue’s current outreach efforts.

We learned a lot!

Of 1,500 surveys emailed 500 individuals cared enough to respond – 12 of them in Russian!  We learned that interfaith issues directly or indirectly affect most of our congregation and that the respondents are looking for more education about, information on and orientation to, the Jewish community.

Members of our committee researched other outreach programs at synagogues around the country. We consulted with interfaith experts and held focus groups with Beth Am congregants to learn more about how we might make the worship experience more personal and how we might bring more of the “joy of Jewish living” to Beth Am families.

We met almost monthly fortified by Ellen Erlich and Brenda Borovoy’s homemade brownies and deep conversation. We quickly found out how many programs and opportunities exist in other communities that welcome interfaith families. We even offered a new program here – a Grandparent’s Circle for those whose grandchildren are being raised in interfaith homes. This was led by our own Schindler Fellow, Louise Stirpe-Gill, and received rave reviews.

Interfaith Outreach is kind of like Universal Design - creating a community where everyone feels more at home and accepted.

Outreach is the mitzvah of ahavat ger: welcoming the stranger.

Outreach is about supporting families and encouraging their participation in our synagogue.

Rabbi Marder is guiding us to a culture of acceptance and welcome by her decision to officiate at interfaith marriages. Her vision statement for Beth Am clearly reflects her commitment to inclusiveness.

Our committee has made recommendations to the Beth Am board asking for its commitment to make outreach programs a priority. We made suggestions in the areas of leadership, infrastructure and programming.

For example we have asked that that the Board consider modifying the By-laws to include non-Jews in leadership roles in the organization; we asked that the Interfaith Outreach Committee’s work continue as an on-going committee with staff support from a member of the Program Team; and we have recommended other changes to the infrastructure of the organization such as collecting more information on the demographics of Beth Am members and re-designing the common application forms to make them more user friendly.

The Board has received our recommendations and is considering ways for the Task Force’s work to continue in the upcoming year.

Our work is just beginning.

Like Tzelophehad’s daughters, our Committee sought change in the

world order of how all families – not just interfaith families - are brought in and welcomed at Beth Am. Like the daughters, interfaith families want to contribute and participate as full members of the Beth Am community.

As co-chair of the committee, with Ric Rudman, I have been honored to be a part of the group that is shining a light on the opportunities we have before us to create a more welcoming and accepting community for all families as they proceed on their Jewish Journeys.

And as for my own Jewish Journey, I went on to marry the Jewish man I had been dating. Elliott and I have been blessed with two sons and a loving, Jewish community in which to raise them. We participated in Shabbaton here at Beth Am and went to Israel with Rabbi Zweiback on his first family trip. Our boys both became Bar Mitzvah and were confirmed. The boys are secure in their Jewishness – when asked, they’re quick to say “We’re Jewish, Mom’s not….”

I wasn’t sure that, being raised in Protestant churches, I could even have a “Jewish Journey.” For years, I thought that being a part of Beth Am was only about educating our sons in the Jewish tradition. They were taught that “it’s OK to be different – it’s OK to be Jewish” and I took that to mean that it was OK for me to be “different” too.

Being asked to co-chair the Interfaith Outreach Committee changed that. I’ve come to see that there IS a place for me here at Beth Am. I have been welcomed and accepted. I feel very connected to the Beth Am family. I appreciate the opportunity to be welcoming to others.

It was many years later after the passing of my Great Aunt Evelyn and her niece, my mom, that I was able to step forward and take my place as the steward of the Sohns’ property in Pampa . Someday that land will be passed on as an inheritance to my Jewish sons and hopefully on to their families.

I have to think that Aunt Evelyn would appreciate the fact that my family has found strength and support in a spiritual community.

The community that is Congregation Beth Am.

I know that I have.

Shabbat shalom!