President's Column

I was delighted to be reminded in an interview of our first president, Gerald Marcus, that the actions taken by our founding members, and the “why” of those actions, remain deeply integrated into our collective DNA — Beth Am is a house of the people and a place of connection; to be the strong and holy space we need and want, we act to bring our best selves to the community. To make this connection, we must know ourselves, and also make space to get to know each other. “When you build a new house, you shall make a guardrail for your roof so no one shall fall.” As we take care of ourselves, it’s incumbent upon us to simultaneously provide for others. Caring for ourselves and strengthening our community are intertwined. Our community needs us, and equally if not more important, we need the connection to others. Gerry Marcus described how our founders understood this: “We, early, developed the practice of having a meditation; led by members… many times we conducted services ourselves. Very early we developed the practice of having one member of the group (we rotated from week to week) get up and talk about something — not a sermon, but something that he or she was interested in, for two or three minutes. The people dealt with this very seriously. They wrote out their statements, and we had people who probably had never gotten up in front of a group at all who got up. Sometimes, what they talked about was embarrassing; it was kind of like writing your Bar Mitzvah speech, in a way.”

In these moments of vulnerability, our founding members got to know each other, learned to trust each other, and as individuals and collectively, built the community they wanted, and that remains ours today.

And what is it that motivates us to build this community, to be vulnerable, to roll up our sleeves, make the effort, show up? As we’re learning from the Shared Identity findings, we want to belong and be seen, to see ourselves in both the history and future of our vital community. It isn’t enough to sit in the pews. Those of us who choose Beth Am feel that sense of belonging by “doing”. We choose to contribute to a community that allows our fellow members to be their best selves, and that supports us as we strive to do the same. What a joy it is for me to be present at a simcha, perhaps simply as a greeter, listen to a congregant read from the Torah for the first time, or be in the middle of the pre-Shabbat oneg chatter, hugs and hellos. How meaningful it has been to hold hands with some of you in difficult times, or wrestle with challenging ideas, emerging with a deeper understanding of each other’s perspectives. Douglas Abrams observes in The Book of Joy the importance of communal connection, after listening to the Dali Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu consider that so much of our stress is dependent on seeing ourselves as separate from others, “Once again, the path of joy was connection and the path of sorrow was separation. When we see others as separate, they become a threat. When we see others as part of us, as connected, as interdependent, then there is no challenge we cannot face — together.”

When we treat people as a blessing, they usually respond in kind. When we are grateful for the people in our lives, they often become people worthy of the gratitude we feel for them. How will you participate in this community that you have chosen? I look forward to the joy of participating with you! 

Deb Radin
president@betham.org